Where Did This Idea That Everything In Life Is Supposed To Be Hard Come From

Where Did This Idea That Life Is Supposed To Be Hard Come From? 

Health: Where did the idea that exercise has to suck come from?

The anxiety associated with working out and not the working out itself is the number one reason people either don’t work out or dread going to the gym.

I work out, but I was no exception. I dragged myself to the gym, why? Why is something we delighted in doing as kids, in essence play, something we turn into drudgery as adults? It’s stupid.

Because SEAL training sucks? More SEALs die training than in actual combat. No disrespect but the word special is in the name Special Forces for a reason.  Or because Arnold passed out while lifting? No disrespect he’s the greatest, but also took a load of steroids. What are we doing?!?

There is no rule that says you have to run or lift weights there are very, very many physical activities to choose from and a lot of them require little to no money or equipment, why do you think football is the most popular sport in a world? All it requires is a ball.

No one said you had to work out to exhaustion, or make yourself sore, or shame yourself for not being good enough. Unless, and even if you are a professional athlete. 

E.g I was trying to get back to benching 300, not as a max, but with reps. Then I heard about flow, and asked myself why, I was struggling so much, having to stop in between sets for safety so I didn’t drop the weight on myself?

Instead today I reduced the weight to 225 had full range of motion, was energized and was positive and pumped for my next workout.


Walk/run a mile as slow as you want. Why? Because this way you will stick with it, if I run 5 miles one day a week and you run 1 mile every day, you have run more!

If you do Jujitsu for three hours, twice a week and I go one hour every day, I have trained more, learned more and my body is not as banged up or sore.

Who are we competing with? And why? For what? Is there money in it? Come on!


Gaining wealth working for someone else is relatively difficult, because it is in your employer’s interest to keep you dependent on your paycheck. This is a concept even a child can understand, yet most of us do it.

The only way to become independently wealthy aside from an inheritance is to figure out the most valuable work you can do, that is also the easiest for you to do. The reason being is you will not give up at it, and over time you will acquire the skill required to bring your asking price as high as it will go. It will not be right away, but you will not dread your work. You will find a joy in it.

And there is literally nothing in (now) the universe that human focus cannot overcome. We can go to Mars, you think you can’t make a million doing something you actually care about?

But no, the fear keeps us trapped right where the bosses want us. There is a reason laws favor entrepreneurs and trample the worker, I’m not saying it’s right or good, all I’m saying is take a step back and really think about it.

Let’s take Eminem, he has no advanced degrees, no college degree, not even a high school diploma, yet he taught himself to use words as well as any of the greatest writers in history, whether you like his music or not.

He found the thing he was good at, and simply did not give up. Nothing, not his background, his race, his education, his personal life, his health and being prone to addiction could stop him.

Now you’re thinking well that’s Eminem, but here’s the thing we all have something we are good at! Have you heard Em’s teenage raps? Or even his album ‘Infinite’ no disrespect but a lot of it sucked. ‘Infinite” bombed and deserved to, I mean I like it a little in retrospect but objectively, not that good.

You’re supposed to suck at the beginning!

If I bought a video game and cleared it in a couple of hours, I’m either an amazing gamer or the game sucks, most likely the latter, because I’m not an amazing gamer. (Now 


Where did the idea that needing others is a weakness come from? Probably from a group that wants to keep people weak.

This one is simple but is not easy, actually that’s an understatement, it’s often the hardest. But here is the break down, the truth is we all have a support group of people whether we know it or not.

 Family is the most obvious but it extends well past that, class mates, colleagues, bosses, girl friends, friend, the people we see at the gym, whether we know it or not we are all connected, even *sigh* Facebook, but please, please, please don’t rely on Facebook, the kids do, and because of this the kids are depressed, I won’t even go into the stats because this blog is supposed to be uplifting.

The problem is this myth of the lone rugged individual, it’s a f’ing lie. Even Batman the very archetype of the (mostly) self-made loner is surrounded by a family, not only are we better together, it’s the only way we survive. 

Women instinctively know this, where as men are literally dying of loneliness simply because they have been fed the lie that a man does not need others. 

It is so very stupid and dangerous, yes men are more resistant to isolation, but that is like saying men are more resistant to bullets, we probably are, but they still hurt.

Here is why I say it is simple, all that need be done is to ask for help, some may refuse, heck most may refuse, but someone somewhere will answer. If not someone you know, then a helpline, a hospital even 911 will help unless you’re… that’s another story. Humans are programmed to help you, if your worst enemy yelled out his problem, you would instinctively start to solve it even if you didn’t say it out loud.

But we don’t ask! And that’s the biggest tragedy of all, because together there is literally nothing humans can’t solve except maybe death. You think you being out of a job, or losing your house is even a challenge? For you maybe, but not for the combined resources of everyone you know.

But don’t even let it get that far, I’m a natural loner, like I’m sure a lot of you might be, so this is weird to say, tend to your social circle, if you are not naturally given to reaching out, set a weekly schedule of people you have to call, put Mom on it first.

Get a hobby, religion counts, go talk to girls, go to a bar, go do something with other people, or you will lose perspective and with that your grip on reality. 

Gori ‘The Truth’ Olufon is the top Men’s dating coach in the D.C area.

He offers travel and local Dating Communication Bootcamps as well as shares 

bleeding edge articles on Dating Communications. For both and more visit


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