How I Took Over VA Beach Or The Science Of Making People Like You

So I learned ‘game’ in college and it worked not because of the people there but rather in spite of them. I remember going to this bar called The Edge pretty regularly and when I didn’t have game they just ignored me, but when I started getting ‘game’ like the Red Queen Theory no matter how good I got the bar counteracted me like I was a virus and it was a living organism.

If I got into a good set with good conversation, the music got louder, if I used the loud music to dance, it would switch to something undanceable, not to mention all the guys and girls in the bar actively cock-blocking me. Luckily I was an ass-hole or I would have gotten discouraged. You see I wasn’t in a frat, on a sports team nor did I have a big group of friends or you know— friends.

My life was workout, martial arts, get girls, act, drink, with a sprinkling of school, friends were just something that got in the way of getting girls. So ODU worked against me the whole time, but what I did not realize about that was when I ‘gamed’ any where else I was like a Kryptonian under a yellow sun. Anywhere but ODU, I had XXXXXXX Super Powers!

Red Queen Theory: is an evolutionary hypothesis which proposes that organisms must constantly adapt, evolve, and proliferate not merely to gain reproductive advantage, but also simply to survive while pitted against ever-evolving opposing organisms in an ever-changing environment. 

It all started when one day I went to the beach in Summer. It was sun and sand, I was ripped so I could walk around with my shirt off, there were girls from the Eastern European countries there to work, American seasonal hire, tourists from around the world, all hot, all in bikinis and all on the beach during the day, and in bars and clubs during the night, all bored and looking for excitement and none of the men had any game. I was in Heaven.

I quickly worked out a system to be on the beach everyday in the Summer. I took the bus from 20 miles away and the VA bus system is fucked, I mean it took 2 or 3 hours each way.

I went in the morning and day gamed or swam or hung out till around 5pm, which gave me time to go home eat, sleep, and change so I could come back and night game in the bars and clubs, till 2am in the morning, by then of course the buses had stopped running, which suited me fine as VA Beach in the Summer doesn’t sleep! Even though everything is closed.

Think about it, you are a hot girl, went clubbing, the club closed at 2 am but where you are from things go till 3 or 4am. What do you do? Where do you go? You’re in a hotel room and it looks out onto the beach.

Duh! You go out on to the beach and hope to find some excitement.  And you do it’s the Truth.

I took over VA Beach, no one knew how, I will explain how. Using Robert Cialidini’s seminal work Influence: The Psychology of Persuasion. (Get a copy!)

Making People Like You

1. Physical Attractiveness

The more attractive you are the more people like you. I’m not being full of myself (ok a little) but any guy can achieve this if they put in the work. VA Beach is a beach town so I worked out. Pretty straight forward.

All things being equal a woman will pick the fitter, taller, better looking guy. You can’t control height or really what your face looks like, but you sure can get fitter (bigger) than the other guy.

2. Similarity

Now I’m black and Nigerian so how did I use similarity to win the mostly, white and foreign VA Beach over. 

1. Well Summer is the one time that there are more foreigners than Americans at VA Beach. And I’m foreign, so instant in!

  1. I wore camo board shorts. VA Beach is filled with the military and as I mentioned before I worked out like a motherfucker, (still do actually) I shave my head, and have a warrior’s bearing (thank you martial arts) so everyone just assumed I was military. Unconsciously. If they asked, obviously I said “…no” which just convinced them I was and didn’t want to tell them, or wasn’t allowed to. Sorry to any operators, but I really did “try” to tell them I ‘wasn’t’, lol, honest :)

  2. I wore a cowboy hat everywhere all the time, not only did that make me super recognizable (more on that later) but, what’s more American than a black cow boy, that may or may not be in the military? Foreigners loved it, Americans loved it. Everyone felt like they knew me.

  3. And last but not east during the day, I only ever wore one t-shirt if I had to wear a t-shirt, I won’t tell you which super-hero it was, because I will still wear it. But wearing this super-hero’s symbol on my chest, instantly made me recognizable and liked by anyone that saw it liked that Super-hero.

3. Compliments

When ever I was out, I talked to everyone, and made everyone, from the cops, to the bar tenders, to the shop girls, to tourists, the guys, the girls, everyone! I made everyone feel important, asked how they were and genuinely listened to them. And next time I saw them I remembered what we talked about and asked about that. It’s a pure politician tactic but it works, because listening without interrupting or waiting to speak is the biggest compliment you can give another person. Read the “You walk alone” and “Let him who has ears” blogs for deeper studies on going out alone and listening.

I complimented everyone and never talked about myself, never complaining, always encouraging, the result, everyone gave me social proof and I was cool with everyone. I was the mayor of VA Beach.

4. Contact

People like people who are near them. If you met a lion at work, you would freak out the first day, but if he was cool, by the end of the week, you’d just say “Hey Leo, how’s the pride?” And he’d reply “ROAR!”

Same thing with a resort city, a school, an improv group etc. At first you’re ‘new’ and then you are ‘one of them’ and then the people that come after you are ‘new’. Which is how I ended up playing tour guide to all the new tourists. I knew everyone, where everything was, and how to go about getting it.

As for how? I literally went to the beach everyday of the Summer. It would have been impossible to not know of me and impossible to not at least be familiar with me. 

This principle will even work in a day. All I have too do is walk around in my seemingly thrown together outfit, that is actually designed to make you like me and be unignorable.

5. Co-operation

This is the whole point of liking, you’ve heard the saying people want to do business with their friends, this is the root of that. With everyone I met in VA Beach there was an unspoken contract between us, I am going to help you have the most fun I can today, just as long as you help me have the most fun I can today. This is partying, this is friendship, this is information, this is covers waived, this is free hotel rooms, this is flirting, this is sex.


And there you have it! I am going to the Beach June 28th-30th, if you can you should come.


This is Sandy, we met Unda Da Sea.

This is Sandy, we met Unda Da Sea.